THE WEEKEND THAT WAS!

We are in the month of September and I guess everyone is saying "Wake me up when September ends!" It is the other way for me! I will not wait for September to end. I have started getting down to serious business as we approach the end of the year and this weekend was just the perfect one to get me in to the end of year party mood. Do not be surprised how some of us start very early. Kim and I have already made our reservations for Christmas and New Year's at this exclusive resort in Wasini. I can assure you it is costing us an arm and leg but totally worth it! Anything for Kim and I is worth it! If you have not started making plans for the holidays then you had better get on to that!

Enough of our private holiday plans with Kim! The weekend that was saw us spend some time away from the hustle and bustle of the city. We decided to attend the Rift Valley Festival in Naivasha over the weekend. Deciding whether to go for that or Earth Dance Nairobi was not an easy task for me and Kim won! The whole idea was to spend quality time as we walk down the road to self-discovery and love. Naivasha was the  ideal location! We decided to stay at an exclusive and private farm on the Lake Naivasha as opposed to the very crowded camp sites dotting the shores of Lake Naivasha. It would have been very unfortunate to get a hotel where everyone from Nairobi was staying at. We did not was to have a feeling like Nairobi has been relocated to Lake Naivasha like what happens to the coastal city of Mombasa over Christmas! Kenyans need to find other holiday destinations. 

Our journey started on Friday afternoon when I went to pick up Kim's new car from the garage where it was being tuned. We had decided to have a thrill with her new car and the best road was the Nairobi-Nakuru highway. FYI she is a petrol-head more than I and a Subaru Forester would not have been a better car. Congratulations Kim on your new aqusition! I then picked her from work and passed by the loft to pick up our bags which were packed the previous night. 3 p.m found us cruising past Kimende. Oh boy, didn't fall in love with this car! I am jealous already! We got to Naivasha some minutes before 4 pm and headed straight to the farm where we had reserved a room. I have resisted mentioning the name of the farm to avoid it being discovered. Trust Kenyans to be spoilers for every good thing!

We spend the night at the room and headed to the Farm club house for dinner and drinks. We danced all night long with the white farm owners and their friends. Naivasha I realized has a very elite, private and exclusive community of whites who only hang out in exclusiveness. Show me Kenyans who have a Farm club house, complete with a chef, resident Dj, fully equipped bar and will hang out amongst themselves. I doubt there many.

On Saturday we checked out the festival and the line up was good. Check out the link above. Dj Adrian was my  favorite. He never disappoints. I guess I am old school like that. Show me a 28 or 32 year old who did not listen to Dj Adrian in their days. While at the performance in the evening, I received a call from Dave. You remember Dave from my office? I almost forgot to tell you a story I had promised to tell about Dave. That is for the next post. Dave and his girlfriend Diana have been having a rough time of late and two weeks ago she packed her bags and moved back home. Dave sounded low when I answered his call. I had tried to keep off work and other unnecessary interruptions but Dave's call could not go unanswered. 

"Hey. How are you?" he asked. 

"I'm well" I responded. 

"Could you come over to my place? I am lonely!" he said. 

"Sorry I can't. I am in Naivasha with Kimberly. I will pass by when I come back on Sunday evening". I told him.

"Cool, halla when you are back. Have fun" he signed off and hang up. 

I really felt bad for him. If I knew he would be that lonely, Kim and I would have taken him with us to Naivasha. 

Well to cut the long story short, Kim and I had lots of fun. We did connect in many ways, discovered endless opportunities. By the time we were leaving Naivasha, I was thinking its time I took it to the next lever with Kim. The rain which I am told is a sign of blessings in the African communities was probably an indication that our relationship was sanctioned. The rain was all over and when we got to Nairobi, I was too tired to pass by Dave's. I talked to him in the morning at the office but this was the work place, not much can be discussed. I will drop by his place with a bottle of wine tomorrow or Thursday.

Enjoy the month of September!

Yours truly

DA

TOILET FLIES

It has been over a month since I blogged and I just realized that it is in writing that I find solace. I have been busy in the past month and travelling a lot to attend to demanding clients. I do not mind that because thanks to them the bills get paid. I have also been dealing with people at work and also in my social circles and oh boy! People can be really a pain in the ass!

Have you ever used a dirty toilet and there are those flies that won't just go away no matter how much pesticide you spray? You mostly find these in downtown or those pit latrines up country. Most of the time you have no option but to go in, do your thing and get the hell out of the toilet as soon as is practically possible. 

This is my story with one of 'those flies of men' that won't just go away. A couple of weeks ago I was hanging out with Tom at our favorite bar. You all know Tom by now, my shag buddy. We were just there doing our thing, drowning some Jameson whiskey when two of his friends came by. We did exchange the usual pleasantries and a bit of chit chat. I am not friends to either of them but since I am an out going person, I engaged them before they decided to get their own table. 

In that brief exchange, I noticed one with whom I crossed eyes several times. I really can not say he was hot because I can show you a hot man when I see one. Anyway, I did not mind knowing him and maybe doing him. After thinking about it for a while, I decided to let is pass. Two weeks later, I got a text that read "Hey DA. This is Keith, we met at the bar two weeks ago. I am a friend of Tom. Do you want to have a drink sometime?" I ordinarily do not respond to such text messages but I replied "Sure, why not". Then a date was set.

We met a week later shared a couple of drinks and late into the night I could tell where this was headed. Luckily, my girlfriend Kim was having one of those sleep overs at her friends. They call it girls movie night where they watch movies at either of her friend's and drink wine all night. I was lucky last time it was her turn to host her friends at my loft I had traveled to Egypt. So while having drinks with Keith, he suggested that we 'check out' his apartment. I knew at that moment what was going to happen. At the apartment, it went down. I did him a couple of times after which I headed back home. 

That was the beginning of my problems with Keith. This guy literally became a pain in my ass. He started calling me everyday, then increased frequency to twice, thrice and even four times a day! He was getting on my nerves. I told him one time that what we had was just a ONS (One Night Stand) and that it would never happen again. He did not get it and now wanted more which I could not give. I am the kind of guy who does not believe in gay or man-to-man love or relationships. That is what he wanted and I told him that it was not going to happen. He still kept on calling and sending me text messages. He was becoming too much now! Thank goodness to Android phones, I got one of those applications that block unwanted calls and text messages. That app works perfectly and I have gotten rid of that nagging toilet fly that won't just go away called Keith! 

Yours truly, 

DA

THE DEMON IN ME!

Last weekend, my girlfriend traveled out of the country to attend a seminar on a project they intend to undertake in Northern Kenya. I can see the shock on most of your faces. Yes, I have a girlfriend, who has a very good job with one of the Community Based Organizations here in Kenya. Kimberly and I have been going out for almost a year now and I really love her a lot and so does she. You see, the life of being on the down low allows you to live a 'normal' life; have a girlfriend or wife, have a good job, have good friends, drive a good car and basically enjoy the pleasures of life, yet on the other side, you get to have sex with fellow men, without raising an eyebrow.

So after dropping her off at the airport on Thursday night, ideas started coming my way. 'Should I get naughty this weekend?' I asked myself. It had been a while since I had sex, with a man and here I was, having a cool five days alone. One thing that was certain was that I was going to have a good time over the weekend. Having a girlfriend kind of keeps you tied down. She wants you go stay indoors watch movies, or go out for dinner, or tag you along to her friend's house for a random drink up. Basically when she is around, I don't have 'me' time. Instead its 'we' time. I really do not mind it at all.

If you have watched the Hangover 2 then you know about Stu's demon. At the end Stu was courageous enough to face his would be father-in-law and tell him off, thanks to the demon in him. Last weekend, I was feeling that I had a small demon in me that wanted to be unleashed! I really wanted to go crazy. I was very horny in short! After work in Friday evening, I accompanied my workmates to the lounge bar near our office for a couple of drinks but I was not feeling the drinking vybe. At 9 o'clock I excused myself to attend to an emergency. You know how you create these emergencies out of the blues and you have to ditch your friends at the bar? That is what I did. I called my shag buddy Tom and told him what I needed. My shag buddy is this masculine twenty four year old who is also on the DL. I am not that old so do not think I am a cradle snatcher. He is four years younger than me! I like him because he is all masculine, a rugby player who acts very straight! In fact he also has a  girlfriend but he does not keep them for long.

 

When we met up with Tom, we decided that my loft would be the perfect place. We headed straight to my bachelor pad and started drinking from there. I always keep alcohol in my house. One hour later, he was tipsy and I was getting drunk. I poured him more Jameson and he responded to it well. I love Jameson, probably the best Irish Whiskey I have ever come across. A few minuted later, we were on carpet making out heavily. We ripped off each others clothes and sucked each other! This is getting graphic, let me go easy! Back to the action! We did our thing and the demon in me came out that night. I did Tom five times that night, a feat I have never achieved with any man! The demon in me came out that night!

This week on Wednesday morning, I went to pick up Kim from the airport. As I was racing down Mombasa Road, I kept thinking about the events of last weekend. My demon was telling me stuff I was not liking at all. The demon was telling me to bring it out to Kim! There was no way I was going to do that! I love Kimberly a lot and there was no way I was going to tell her about my 'other' life. I would lose her! I could not tell her, but the demon in me wanted to come out once more, but in another form. I decided not to. I could not afford to lose her. I picked her and she dropped me at the office. She went home to rest and would pick me up after work. It felt good she was back. I knew I love her. I am thinking of taking her out tonight and maybe I can show her the demon in me, in another form! I know she will like it.

Yours truly

DA

THAT AWKWARD MOMENT WITH DAVE

#thatawkwardmoment is hash tag I see a lot on twitter. I do not tweet a lot because of the nature of my work. Oh, I forgot to mention that I am on twitter too. You can follow me @DownlowAttorney. So I learn these social media terminologies slowly and sometimes way too late. However, #thatawkwardmoment is one thing that I go through every day at the office. At first it was traumatizing but with time I have gotten used to it. Let me tell you how it came to happen.

I work for a large law firm and we have quite a huge clientele, even outside the country. One of our clients are based in South Africa where we have partnered with other law firms and occasionally we travel to Johannesburg to attend to our clients. Sometime early this year, in March, to be precise, I traveled to South Africa with a fellow lawyer from our Chambers. Dave is my junior and I have mentored him since he joined the firm and still do. As a result therefore, we have ended up becoming close. We will occasionally hang out while back in the country and get to share a lot. With time, I started to develop some feelings and started seeing him in a different light. These were physical feelings and the more we spend time together, the more I wanted to dig him! He is the kind of guy who showed all those signs of curiosity and potential to go for a one night stand thing with another man! For a long time, I never acted on my feelings nor told him of what I had been thinking! You know guys on the down low, like me, never express themselves well, that is why we do not do well in relationships especially with fellow men! I knew an opportunity would present itself. So I let him get closer to me and feel comfortable around me.

Johannesburg, South Africa is where the opportunity presented itself. This was his first time he had traveled out of the country with a work mate on account of the law firm. We had a week to spend and for a strange reason I felt that this was it, like the Michael Jackson's This is It! After working hard everyday, we would end up in a club to grab a few drinks with our fellow lawyers from Jozi. They say sincerity and alcohol are good friends, which I knew! So I had to hatch plan if I was gonna dig Dave. We finished our assignment on Thursday and were due to fly back on Sunday. I decided that make use of the weekend to get to Dave. On Friday evening I asked Dave to accompany me as I sampled the Jozi nightlife. He gladly agreed since he was not going to do much at the hotel room. We took a taxi from the hotel room after drowning some vodka and headed to Manhattan Club, 19 Wessels Road. The clubs here are well done and beautiful than in Nairobi, which I won't deny that is catching up in the clubbing scene. We found a comfortable place to seat amidst a group of young hot guys and bevy of beauties. South Africans are hot, and I hope Kenyans can learn from them on how to be hot and fabulous! Both men and women here are awesome! Every time I touch down in South Africa, I normally get hard! Anyway, we ordered our drinks and party continued!

After a couple of hours of drinking, I decided to take advantage of the situation because the opportunity had presented itself! This was the perfect timing! We were both drunk but I think Dave was more drunk than I. We danced a lot and at some instances got close to each other. I could feel his body and his sexy cologne! Dave is the kind of guy who knows how groom. Well fitting clothes, perfect cologne to match the occassion and a sexy hair cut! He's perfect. The good thing about him is that he maintains all these. I decided to make my move when he was dancing with his back on me. I whispered in his hear that I was horny and that we needed to head back to the hotel. I told him this as I held him strongly on his side slightly above the waist and made sure that he felt my hard wood. I slightly pressed it on his behind! You don't want to know his reaction!

Next thing we were in a cab heading back to the hotel and kissing passionately! I was expecting to see the cab driver shocked but he was not! This was South Africa, the rainbow nation! The only country in Africa where same sex marriage is allowed under the country's Constitution. At the hotel lobby, we staggered slowly to the lift lest we raised suspicions as to our mischief! The staff at the hotel knew us and we did not want to mess around with our reputation and respect. At the suite, a soon as the door was closed behind us, things got steamy. Clothes were ripped off and you can guess what went down. I did Dave and I was amazed how he could do this. This was his first time with a man and his first time being done. They say it is the most painful thing especially on the first time. I would not no because I have never been done! Anyway, Dave impressed me! This was repeated again on Saturday evening and when we woke up on Sunday morning, we agreed that we should act like it never happened. We flew back to Nairobi on Sunday afternoon ever since then, whenever Dave and I meet in the office, or along the corridors or in the lift, there is always that awkward moment. He still looks up to me as a mentor and in fact we have grown tighter as friends. But that awkward moment is always there.

Next time I will tell you what Dave asked me to do for him!

Your truly,

DA

Doesn't really matter, Queer or Not

Congratulations are in order for Dr. Willy Munywoki Mutunga and Nancy Baraza on their appointment as Chief Justice and Deputy Chief Justice (of the Republic of Kenya) respectively. This post may be a little too late since a lot has been said about the vetting of the Chief Justice and Deputy Chief Justice and the issues that emerged therein.

One of the emerging issues, that proved to be a thorn in the flesh of many, especially the mainstream religious organizations and the conservatives was the issue of the sexuality of the two candidates. Dr. Willy Mutunga wears an ear stud and many people have questioned his moral standing and sexuality because of the stud. He is also going through his second divorce and many have said that he lacks the moral authority to be the head of the judiciary. Nancy Baraza on the other side, is writing a thesis about the rights of homosexuals in East Africa.  This has led many question and speculate about her sexuality. Being her divorcee did not make it any easier for her.

Well, as a legal practitioner and one on the down low, I do not have issues with one being gay or lesbian and that person being the head of the Judiciary. I am sympathetic to the rights of the sexual minorities, as a result of circumstances, but I do not take to the streets and shout about it. The issue of concern here is, whether the recently appointed head of the Judiciary will be upto to task. In my considered opinion, I think they are upto task. I will be keen to see how jurisprudence will be shaped with them at the helm of the Judiciary. Someone told me that courts will soon make rulings as to the unconstitutionality of sections 162, 163, 165 of the Penal Act (Code) now that we have Dr. Willy Mutunga and Nancy Baraza as the Chief Justice and Deputy Chief Justice respectively. If that will happen, it is only a matter of time. I am however convinced that such a ruling is way overdue especially on section 165 of the Penal Act (Code) which simply outlaws any sexual activity or intercourse between two males (same sex activity) whether in public or in private. The Bill of Rights in the Constitution of Kenya, under Article 31 provides inter alia that;

     

Every person has the right to privacy, which includes the right not to have-

• their person, home or property searched;
• their possessions seized;
• information relating to their family or private affairs unnecessarily required or revealed; or
• the privacy of their communications infringed.

In view of the above, section 165 of the Penal Act (Code) is thus rendered obsolete and therefore not Constitutional. It would be difficult to prove if two men had sex in private. Anyway, that is enough digression.

Let us see what Mutunga and Baraza will do for the people of Kenya who have for a long time suffered due to the culture of impunity, corruption and inefficiency of the Judiciary

Yours truly,

DA

I AM BACK

It has been a long time since I published on this my blog. A lot has happened since then. The last post was about mixing business with pleasure and one of my clients was in the picture. You can guess what happened. Well I decided to take the plunge and the results were fantastic. You see, I always have a strict policy when it comes to personal matters and professional matters. Its either one and not both. So I decided to mix but with very strict rules about how this was going to work. The representative of the investors I was working for happened to be a very mature guy who didn't need much of my rule. So we hit the road and went all the way, you know what I mean.

So after a couple of dinner and drink dates, not forgetting the sexcapades, we decided to call it quits. We called it quits not because he was being send to work in another coutry for a few months but because we didn't want to get emotionally attached. I don't see myself being in a 'relationship' with another man....not going to happen. I am the kind of guy who prefers to meet, hang out, bang and that's it. Love and relationships are for those who believe in love.

Enough of my escapades...... I will try to post more often now that my hands are a bit free... I tell you, it has been a hectic two  months.

Yours truly,

DA

Business and Pleasure

Working as an attorney enables you to meet and interact with many people. For the last two weeks, I have been working with these group of investors who are setting up business in the country. The process of establishing a company in Kenya is a lengthy one, so I have been in touch with one of them who is their representative.

This representative is a young and handsome guy, very technosavy and in touch with his metro-sexuality. He dresses in nice, crisp sharp and fitting suits. He is fine, I can say. 

So, of late, we  have meeting a lot more and at weird hours. I met him last evening at this posh restuarant in Upmarket Nairobi and he called again in the morning to confirm if we were still doing a few drinks tonight. I am not good at reading body language but I can tell that he is into me. I won't deny that I like him but I am not ready to mix business and pleasure. Or should I? Let me give him a call and see how it goes..... It's Friday and some company wouldn't be bad! 


Your truly,


DA

Suffering in Silence

Its that day of the week again, Friday! Everyone loves Fridays. Show me someone who does not and I might.....buy lunch or something! I don't know why I am feeling rich, or it's because the month is over? Enough of digression. So everyone loves Friday and so many things happen this day. Our Moslem brothers have their prayers this day; it's the last day of school for most school-going kids and guys; it's the last day of the week generally! It is the day people decide to have fun like they will never live again! Binge drinking becomes the order of the night. Then, of course, the endless sex all through till Sunday! Basically it is a day or rather night when people get to express their feeling more freely.

A Nairobi lady having fun

Revelers in a Nairobi Club having fun

However that  is the not the issue. I do empathize with our brothers who might not get to express themselves albeit in a sexual way like everyone will tonight. There are quite a number of men both straight and gay who suffer in silence because of their 'failure to launch' or 'failure to perform'. Makes sense? Ok, let me say it as it is! There are many guys who suffer from ED (Erectile Dysfunction) and or PE (Premature Ejaculation)! This does not give them room to have fun or express themselves as they would want to! I have heard of stories where a couple (both heterosexual and gay) have broken up because of failure to launch or failure to perform. If you find yourself in such a scenario where your man cannot perform, I think its best to find what makes him happy and what he likes. Talk about it and find ways of addressing it. Be supportive and even accompany him to the doctors. That way, the problem will be easily solved. All these, I am told, are curable. So one should not take that drastic step of breaking up with their partner because they can't perform!

Do have a nice weekend fellas and be safe! Remember; DO NOT DRINK AND DRIVE & ALWAYS USE PROTECTION! 

Yours truly, 

DA

Why Queer Relationships Fail

This has been an interesting week for me, both at work and personally. Work is always full of activities and meeting many interesting people. Everyday is a learning experience, as I have come to learn. I would have loved to share some of the interesting things I came across this week but professional code of conduct bars me from discussing such issues.

However, this week, I was meeting a client for a breakfast meeting in one of the coffee lounges in town. I made one observation that got me thinking about so many things. I noticed that there were very many mature men having breakfast in town. And I asked myself, I thought men leave their homes after having breakfast that has been prepared by their wives (or girlfriends) or by the house-help (of course under supervision by the lady of the house)? It hit me hard that a majority of marriages and of course heterosexual relationships fail the moment they take off!

What about queer relationships? I have had a couple queer friends and from the stories I have heard, our brothers and sisters in heterosexual relationships are in a better place! I know for sure, that over 85% of queer or gay relationships don't last for a year! I have heard of exceptional ones going for between 5 and 15 years! I don't know what the magic is; maybe they should share the trick with my gay brothers. One of the reasons I think gay relationships flop is because of the equality of both parties. I know people play different roles in bed but two men together can't work! All men consider themselves as equals and that they can do what the other can do. 'If my boyfriend is out for drinks with his friends, why can't I go out and hang out with my friends too'; that is how they think. Again, none of the partners is willing to be submissive like a woman submits to a husband in a heterosexual marriage or relationship. Homosexual relationships will only work when one partner realizes their position in the relationship and is willing to submit to and respect the other. 

And just as I was thinking about my relationship status, the client walked in..... 

Yours truly, 

DA

Numero Uno

I am the DA, not the District Attorney, but the Downlow Attorney. As the name suggests, I am an Attorney and on the down low. My life is full of interesting experiences both in legal career and down low aspects. I love what I do, defending the rights of people and finding justice where none exists. I also have a thing for guys! Damn, some brothers do drive me crazy! Being on the down low is not easy! And being an Attorney on the down low is not easier! 

This is my numero uno post and i'd like you to join me as I share with you stories of my life and its beauty.

Yours truly,

DA